Saturday, July 30, 2005

Welcome to Ikhti Bar

I think people who open bars and give them names haven't got a clue what they're talking about. They've got it all wrong. What kinda names are these? Sky Bar? Asia Bar? Fashion Bar? L Bar? Creativity? Imagination? I think not. No matter how small it is, they always manage to jam themselves and their lame creations inside a box.

I, on the other hand, have got it all figured out.

What we all need are bars with a message. Bars for a cause. Bars that think outside the box.

Alaouak Bar: Non-alcoholic venue for the religious who want to get together and have some good, clean fun, without consuming the forbidden and engaging in "almounkar".

Shoulakh Bar: For politicians and businessmen with regular news and business updates automatically or on-demand. Courtesy cuban cigars.

Sornak Bar: For all those going through menopause and middle age crises. Jack Daniels and Smirnoff a gogo. Courtesy handkerchiefs to the watery and the emotionally uninhibited.

Moukhta Bar: A venue for scientists, intellectuals and nerds, with special emphasis on dairy and caffeinated beverages. Alternatively, a venue to initiate the young and innocent, who are still picking their noses, to the wisdom and pleasures of good ol' spirits.

Yes. That's how I see it and how I think it should be.

And if things don't go as planned but as expected, if I go bankrupt, if I get shunned and defamed, I will say hey, welcome to your life and mine, welcome to Ikhti Bar.

You're here now, and you'll be gone soon so, sit down, kick back, relax.

Drinks always on the house.


Blogger Tempest said...

Nice. But I take offence at the mention of JD, the nectar of the gods.

Mid-life crisis? for shame!

11:32 AM  
Blogger Ramzi said...

err... I didn't get it.

1:03 PM  
Blogger Fouad said...

I'm surprised T- what better than the "nectar of the gods" to ease the pain of the aging mortals. Care to explain, for Ramzi's sake and mine?

2:39 PM  
Blogger Sloth said...

/me raises her hand !
i didn't get it too ^_^

2:47 PM  
Blogger Fouad said...

I'm a little confused now. Is it my post that you guys aren't getting? gee I hope not..

3:03 PM  
Blogger Tempest said...

seriuosly people???

was it my comment or the post?

Thermo, yes, I didn't look at it that way, I thought more of it in the terms of that-smell-that-only-old-people-have, or pants that go up to your ribcage...

sloth, get off of IRC
/me grins.

6:19 PM  
Blogger Ramzi said...

I didn't get the words: Alaouak, Shoulakh & Sornak. I know they stand for some arabic term but I can't guess what it is!

7:47 AM  
Blogger Tempest said...

Alaouak Bar: Allah w akbar
Shoulakh Bar: Shoo l akhbar
Sornak Bar: Sorna Kbar
Moukhta Bar: Moukhtabar
Ikhti Bar: Ikhtibar

Walaw ya ramzi? :)

10:45 AM  
Blogger Delirious said...

Ramzi, I see Tempest saba2ni bil tifssirat!
Thermo-Crime, I loved your post! Totally hilarious! I kept raking my brains out for more "Bars" but I couldn't come up with any! Two thumbs up!

10:49 AM  
Blogger Fouad said...

Well guys, I apologize for not being clear enough. My word play, far fetched as it is, appeals to me, but I admit, it ain't first class humor. Glad deli appreciates it :) Temp, thanks for both clarifications.

9:59 PM  
Blogger Ramzi said...

No no they are very funny, now that I get them of course.

10:18 AM  
Blogger [ j i m m y ] said...

i am living my mid age crisis at 25, and still i rarely appreciate anything as much as wine, so where would i go? :(

anyway i wouldn't recommend smirnoff in Sornak Bar. Stolichnaya on the rocks, rocks!

2:37 AM  

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